Love Leads the Way: Musings of a Traveler on the Journey Home

It's 4:30 on a rainy Sunday morning.  I couldn't sleep, and the only thing I could think to do was to sit at my computer and write.  And so, I am here. 

The words have tumbled around in my head for years, waiting to be placed on paper; waiting to be brought to life.  The words no longer simply tumble.  Now they are a flood, rushing through my awareness and rolling over my day-to-day thoughts as I go about my activities and errands.  They beg to be freed from the confines of my mind.  I don't really know how to start.  So, I'll just start and see where it leads.

I've wondered many times as I've heard the call and felt the tug to do what I'm doing now, "Who am I to write about God?"  I have asked God, "Why me?" and the answer I receive is, "Because you are willing."  (Note:  I use the word "God" in describing the Divine Presence or Infinite Intelligence.  It's simply shorthand for me.  It's just a word). 

I have struggled with this for several years.  I began what I call "inspired writing" in 1996.  At that time, I knew that this was going to be my life's work.  But, I have been very hesitant to do it.  First, it was a question of worthiness.  I've not lead the most pristine life and I have no formal training about religion or spirituality.  And then I worried about not being original enough.  It seems that more and more of us "inspired writers" are popping up all the time.  Besides, what we're writing about is not new.  It's been written and spoken about for millennia.  So, what could I have to offer that's different?    

Just getting to the place of surrendering to this process has been a spiritual unfoldment for me.  Every time I question God about it, I receive new insights.  Eventually, the insight that prompted me to stop dallying was the understanding that it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or believes.  This is my journey to an understanding of God and how I relate to that.  Each of us has our own path and our own way of interacting with the universe around us.  We can only understand what we're willing or able to understand. 

I had concerns about some of this being unpopular with the less tolerant religionists who seem to dominate the American landscape these days.  Then it came to me that Jesus wasn't immensely popular with the Pharisees and Sadducees.  He had a message that told them to wake up to the truth and clean up what they'd been teaching.  He admonished them to remember to look to God and to surrender to God first.  He was murdered for speaking out against the religious, cultural, and political abuses of his day. 

Jesus' message of compassion, mercy, love, peace, and personal responsibility, as well as the similar messages of many others, is simply a compass by which we direct our own thoughts, words, and actions.  The message is the key to our salvation, not the message-bearer.  The words are "living words" because they are made alive through us, not because we pledge allegiance to any person or group.  The example of their lives and the spirit of their teaching is the light that guides us.

Jesus taught that he was no different from any of us and that we could do as he did and more.  He taught people through his example.  And, he was the great example, not the great exception.

And so I surrender. I'm simply the writing instrument. 

I am an average, ordinary, everyday kind of person.  I am not lettered in things spiritual or religious.  My spiritual journey has been primarily experiential.  I've taken a walk down several spiritual and religious paths.  I'm not sure why.  I just feel compelled to do it.  In these encounters I've received the gift of seeing and experiencing many expressions of how we search for God in our lives.  I've also learned how we limit the expression of God in our lives.  And I've learned how other people's ideas about God can lead us away from knowing God in the way uniquely intended for each of us as God's own expression of itself.     

I've gone to a variety of churches, taken several seminars, attended workshops and retreats, read many books, and engaged in countless discussions both lively and reverent.  As more than one spiritual guide said, "All paths lead to God, and there are as many paths to God as there are souls."

It's been an interesting journey. I love God and I love the idea of God.  And, that idea has changed over the years.  Deepak Chopra wrote that God evolves as we evolve.  I think that means that we must be willing to release our idea of what we think God is to allow God to show up in our lives in ways that we couldn't recognize otherwise.  Jesus taught this when he said, "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for they shall know God."

In his book, The Sermon on the Mount: The Key to Success in Life, Emmet Fox wrote, "To be poor in spirit means to have emptied yourself of all desire to exercise personal self-will, and, what is just as important, to have renounced all preconceived opinions in the wholehearted search for God.  It means to be willing to set aside your present habits of thought, your present views and prejudices, your present way of life if necessary; to jettison, in fact, anything and everything that can stand in the way of your finding God."

I'm reminded of something a friend experienced recently.  She was frustrated because she was going to have to return a new appliance.  She told me it was shipped without a power cord.  I pulled it out of the box and the power cord was attached right where it was supposed to be!  She was dumbfounded.  She expected the cord to be black.  It was white.  She didn't see it because it didn't look the way she expected it to look.

If we expect God to show up in a way that is not consistent with God's true nature, then we will not experience the fullness of the divine presence as it really is.  How can a limited view of God allow us to experience and know everything that God is? God is the Creator and the created, the form and the formless.  It is a presence and is everywhere present.  It is not a personality, nor does it have human qualities or behaviors.  It's also impersonal.  Since God expresses through and as us, then how can we fully express ourselves if we misperceive our own true nature?  As we accept the limitlessness of God and its presence in our lives, we release our own limitations and God moves through us more freely.  This freer movement of God's creative power through us creates a more expansive and vibrant life for us.  

We must shed old beliefs about God to allow a new and richer knowledge of God to reveal itself to us.  We erroneously believe that we must give up our earthly lives to attain this God realization.  This isn't true; to live life is the reason we are here on Earth!  However, our belief in ourselves as separate from God is what creates trial and tribulation and perpetuates the experience of Hell on Earth.  Once we recognize that we are expressions of God, life as we know it will change dramatically.  There is a saying that, "A mind expanded cannot return to its previous size."  I've found this to be true.  Once I embarked on this journey, I found that I can't be the person I used to be.  It's simply not possible.

If you don't understand what's happening, it can be devastating because it feels as if the world is coming to an end.  In a way, your old world is coming to an end as you move into a new beginning.  If you allow yourself to just flow with it and truly know that God is present right where you are and you know that its nature is life, you will make your way through the tunnel and step into the light.  While it can be challenging, it's not as painful as living a life of fear, frustration, and anxiety. 

Change is difficult because our new life is unfamiliar.  A dear friend was dissatisfied with her life and prayed for change.  Instead of seeing the gift in the new experiences, she was miserable because things weren't the way they used to be.  Her spiritual counselor admonished her, "You pray and pray and pray for God to change your life.  And then you cry and cry and cry because nothing is the same!" 

If you understand what you want to change, then the transition is accomplished with ease and grace.  Disharmony occurs when we don't really know what we want or when we try to change the outside circumstance without changing the beliefs and behaviors that created the situation.  Jesus taught that it is God's good pleasure to give us the kingdom of Heaven.  And, he taught that the kingdom of Heaven is at hand.  "At hand" means right here, right now.  It's not beyond our reach.  All we need to do is to recognize that it is present; to ask and receive.  But, we must first seek the kingdom of Heaven.  We must know what we're truly seeking.  We may think we simply want a new relationship or a job change.  But, it may be that what we truly want is peace, harmony, love, security, and acceptance.  These are the things that are present in the kingdom.  So, these are the things we need to accept as being "at hand," or already present.  They are deeper than outside circumstance.  They are the truth of who we are as expressions of God.  

When we accept those deeper gifts the disharmonious relationship, job, home, financial struggle, health issues, etcetera, will change.  We may find ourselves more accepting and at peace in a difficult situation.  Or the situation itself may shift.  Or, the people, places or things with which we struggled may move out of our lives if they do not assist us in being our highest expression of what we were created to be.  But the bottom line is that we get what we ask for.  As Jesus said, we have not because we ask amiss.  If you're asking for a new relationship instead of asking for the experience of giving and receiving love honestly and openly, you most likely will continue to create the same old relationship patterns over and over again.  If you're asking for more money instead of asking for ease and grace, prosperity and abundance, you may find yourself in a well-paying but unfulfilling job instead of experiencing the profound joy of doing something that is authentically suited for you.  When you are open to joy and creativity, abundance and the opportunities to express that creativity naturally will follow.

To surrender to God is not a passive experience.  It's very active.  And it doesn't mean that we can't enjoy life.  It's not the ascetic life that most of us have been led to believe it is.  Instead, it makes life more richly passionate, deeply honest, enjoyable, beautiful, and unifying.  It's very freeing.  In that new way of being we are released from old patterns and beliefs.  We no longer react from fear and self deprecation.  We stop comparing ourselves to others and judging.  We are free to choose new ways of thinking and being. 

God's will is life, beauty, joy, grace, peace, love, strength, and all of the expressions of those qualities.  Surrendering to God's will is to surrender to a rich, full, and delightful life.  It means we can make love with the person of our choice passionately and tenderly, drink good wine, and eat chocolate.  But we do so in ways that are not destructive or disrespectful of ourselves, the planet, and others.  We start making life-affirming choices.  We find lasting peace and acceptance in something far greater than our temporary, external experiences. 

There always will be challenges.  However, if there's a struggle in meeting the challenge, then we haven't really understood what we're being asked to do.  As a flame transforms darkness simply by being a flame, divine love transforms simply by its presence.  There is no fight, no battle, nor struggle with the devil or demons.  It simply is what it is.  It expresses its nature by just being.  Our job is to accept the presence of that divine love and invite transformation.  Then we simply "be" in its presence and surrender to its process. 

The way of peace is peaceful.  The way of love is loving.  The way of mercy is merciful.  The way of joy is joyful.  The way of beauty is beautiful.  The way of strength is empowering.  The way of light is illuminated.  If your search for God or for a fuller life is not peaceful, loving, merciful, joyful, beautiful, empowering, or filled with light, then consider altering your course and taking a different path.

I know that I am not my outside circumstance.  I know that that which is greater than me is within me just as it is in everything around me.  I have the gift of free will.  That means I have the power and freedom to choose how I act, think, and feel in any given situation.  I am not a victim of circumstance.  My life is a reflection of my inner state, and my thoughts must be focused on peace to enjoy peace, love to enjoy love, health to enjoy health, and so on.  The Bible urges us to "think on these things."  It and all holy texts teach us that to dwell on anger, anxiety, frustration, and ill will toward others only brings those things into our lives.  But when we focus our thoughts, words, and actions on love, respect, compassion, mercy, honesty, generosity, acceptance, and so on, our overall life experience will be filled with these qualities. 

A problem cannot be solved from the same state of mind that created it.  When I find myself in a state of turmoil, I have only to check inside to discern what my thoughts and motives are and strive to bring them back into alignment with the higher vibrations.  When I do that, the situation may still be present, but the way I experience the situation changes.  The solution to the problem will present itself in a way that serves the highest and best good for all.  The key is to let go of control and to release attachment to outcomes.  When I approach a problem from this place, the resolution often is much better than anything that I could try to force.

My dad died after a long and difficult illness, I'm going through a divorce, gas prices are high, and people still cut me off on the freeway and are rude in the grocery store line.  Initially, I might experience feelings of anger, frustration, irritation or helplessness.  However, once I recognize what's happening, I make a choice to let go of those thoughts and feelings and stop judging the situation.  I stop trying to force the outcome of the situation or experience.  I accept that others are simply having their own experiences that really have nothing to do with me; I just happen to be there at the time.  As a result, instead of being embroiled in angst and drama in the midst of these challenges and transitions, I find that I'm much happier, more peaceful, and more richly abundant than I ever thought I could be.  I also have more energy and I can be more open to recognize and receive life's blessings and joys.

Getting to this point has taken 47 years.  I'm looking forward to the even more wonderful insights I'll gather in the next 47.  I know God is tapping me on the shoulder.

I believe God spoke to me when I was 16.  I was going through a difficult time and was seriously contemplating suicide.  As I walked my usual route home from school one day, I looked up and noticed a young boy several yards ahead of me on the sidewalk.  I had never seen him before.  He turned around to face me, walking backward the entire time.  He said, "You have to take the right hand in the left hand."  I didn't understand what it meant until a friend interpreted for me later. This friend clasped his hands in a prayerful way - taking his right hand with his left hand.  This made sense in light of what had happened further in my walk home that one afternoon.  The boy kept the same distance between us for several blocks.  Finally, he turned the corner.  As I rounded that same corner just a few seconds later, he was gone.  He had simply vanished.  As I continued my walk, I was compelled to look up at the sky.  The clouds had a formation that looked as if two hands were held palms up, cupping or cradling something.  As I looked at this formation, I distinctly heard the words, "Don't worry.  Everything is in my hands." 

In more recent years, as I have been drawn to a deeper search for understanding of and communion with God, I've had some deeply mystical experiences.  In January of 1999 I had an extremely profound experience -- one that launched me into an intense spiritual quest that is ongoing.

I was away from home on one of my frequent business trips that year.  I had returned to my hotel room after a long day and was getting ready to tuck in for the night.  I sat at foot of the bed and was contemplating the existence of angels.  I never had a vision of one, although I knew several people who communed with them regularly.  In that moment, I felt a presence beside me.  I turned to it and acknowledged it.  I was instantaneously transported to a place of no place.  I was surrounded by what I can only describe as a bright fog.  The love and peace I felt there were unfathomable.  When I was aware of my physical presence again, I found myself on the floor in another part of the room.  I was weeping and shaking.  I felt as if I had poked my finger into a light socket and my heart felt as if it would burst with the wonder and joy of the experience.  It only lasted a few seconds, but I knew I had been in the presence of God. 

I've since had other experiences that I can only express as some kind of awareness of, or communion with, God.  I can't describe them in words, but I know that something happened, and in some instances they were transformative.  There have been a few times when others were present during these moments.  They were deeply affected by the experience. 

I think I've always been seeking a deeper understanding of God.  As a youngster I went to Sunday School in a Presbyterian church.  As a teenager, I attended a Catholic church and participated in that church's youth activities.  In my mid-twenties I "accepted Christ" in a Southern Baptist church and was appointed as a church trustee.  Following that, I moved on to a Weslyan church, where I was a worship leader and featured soloist.  Additionally, I've had regular attendance and participation in Methodist, Church of Christ, and Lutheran churches. 

I was a "good Christian" and tried to accept the teaching that I had a sinful nature and must repent, and that the only way I could see my way clear of a life of pain was through asking Jesus into my heart.  I wept for the suffering of the man on the cross - suffering that was caused by my sin.  How easy it was to follow the crowd and take as my own the attitudes and beliefs handed down by others!  I was easily accepted into the fold by mimicking the words and actions of those around me, believing that my behavior was going to redeem me in some way.  I could quote scripture with the best of my church companions and never missed an opportunity to try to win my family for Jesus.  I even agreed with the most strident and restrictive interpretations of scripture.  Oddly, this acceptance and agreement were not transformational.  I continued to engage in destructive thoughts and habits, and still could not find the peace I was seeking. 

Still, something kept nudging the back of my brain.  Although I outwardly agreed with what I was being taught (because that was the "right" thing for me to do), the things I was told to believe weren't making sense to me.  The Bible teaches that the tree is known by its fruit.  It also teaches us how to recognize the presence of God in our lives; that the fruits of Spirit are peace, joy, and love and that these qualities serve as a compass pointing us to the highest and best way to lead our own lives.  And yet, I was surrounded by judgmental, critical, intolerant, angry, and unhappy people who professed to be "saved" by their belief that the blood of Jesus washed away their sins.  But they were still mired in their belief in sin and condemnation.  For a religion that teaches that Jesus is the light and the truth and the way, it seemed to me that there was a pretty strong focus on darkness.

For my part, I was supposed to love God and to believe that God loved me.  What didn't make sense was that this loving God was ready to cast me into the depths of Hell if I misbehaved.  If I was made in God's likeness and image, and everything that God created was good (read the first chapter of Genesis), how could I be such a wretch?  Why would God create something it was so ready to destroy?  How could a loving God be so capricious and cruel?  The idea that God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son as a sacrifice for the sins of God's own creation didn't make sense. 

The  word "sin" is an archery term.  It means "to miss the mark."  I've also heard it described as an acronym for Self Imposed Negativity.  In other words, when we "sin" we turn away from divine principle, creativity, and joy and make choices that are harmful, negative, and restrictive of our higher nature.  We generally make these choices from erroneous beliefs about who we think we are and what our lives are supposed to look like.  And the word "repent" simply means to "think again" or to reconsider. 

So, if something you're doing creates struggle and hardship and you do not have the experience of peace and harmony, why keep doing it?  A kinder, gentler world is a choice, not happenstance.  I once heard that peaceful people lead peaceful lives and troubled people lead troubled lives.  It all depends on where one focuses one's thoughts, words, and actions.  We aren't giving up a "sinful" nature.  Rather, we are choosing a more divine nature.  In this context, we feel empowered rather than victimized and we are more likely to make choices that support the highest and best good for our selves and for others. 

During weekly Bible study and Sunday School I found that I was not in sync with the teachers who interpreted the words for us.  I perceived different messages, but there was no room in the discussion for anyone to see things differently.  So I became silent.  But I was dissatisfied with the messages I heard.

I wanted to know more and to have a deeper connection with whatever God was.  I remember listening to the pastor in my Wesleyan church one Sunday and thinking, "This isn't it.  Something is missing here."  At that moment I prayed, "God, I want to know what Jesus really taught." 

After that prayer my life changed dramatically.  At first, I thought my life was being destroyed.  I lost my high-paying and prestigious job.  A long-term relationship ended.  I had to move in with my parents.  My car was repossessed and I went through bankruptcy.  And the newly ordained assistant minister in my church suddenly decided that I could no longer be a worship leader.  In his view, ministry or leadership of any kind wasn't a place for women.  Jesus taught that we are all one.  How can a church that professes to love Jesus and live by his teachings practice separation, intolerance, and prejudice?  I was deeply hurt and confused by this and stopped going to any Christian church.  I didn't realize at that time that the old was passing away so the new could come in. 

A short time later I had a revelation of sorts.  I realized that God isn't who or what I had been taught to believe it is.  I began to ponder the possibility that there could be another way to look at God and at Jesus.  I began to search for a way to know God that was different from what I had learned in traditional Christian environments.

Among the things I've done on my quest:  I joined a Sufi order and studied one teacher's interpretation of Islam for three years.  I've been baptized.  I've covered my head in a Catholic church and in a mosque.  I've attended Celtic mystical ceremonies and Wiccan ceremonies.  I spent a night under the stars on a hilltop on sacred Native American land.  I've had mala beads and a rosary.  I've sat satsung with Buddhists and Hindus.  I know the Lord's Prayer, the Apostle's Creed, Salat, and a number of Hindu chants.  I have a rudimentary understanding of the Kabbala, Huna (Hawaiian mysticism), the Mayan Calendar, and the Merkaba.  I dabbled with tarot cards, runes, ouija boards, and have had my astrological chart drawn.  I've read the writings of or listened in rapt attention to channeled beings.  I've sat with someone I truly know is a master spiritual teacher.  I've sat with those who believed themselves to be master spiritual teachers who, in actuality, were not.  I've studied and practiced Reiki and other types of spiritual and energetic healing.  These days, I'm studying Eastern Mysticism, Kriya Yoga, and New Thought.

I've noticed that beyond all of the differences in each of these spiritual paths, there are striking similarities.  Each path accepts, in its own way, that there is one God, one heart, one soul, one life; although it may be described differently depending on cultural context.  Each path seeks to understand and express that which is "good" in life.  Each path is a way of either reaching out or reaching in to know the part of our humanity that is divine.  Each path teaches that the highest nature of the divine is love and this is our nature as well.  We forget this when we allow life's challenges to cloud our view or when we focus on the details instead of seeing the big picture, or when we believe that we are our experiences.  Thankfully, each path points us back to our source for those moments when we do forget.

The paths are not always perfect or well understood.  Nor are they complete.  But, they are what we have to work with.  If we earnestly and sincerely seek to know and understand the divine, I believe that the way will be made clear to any and all seekers, regardless of which path is chosen.

The purpose of any spiritual practice or religious belief is to perceive the presence of God.  There is only one Truth and that is Divine Truth.  We all have an innate knowledge of the Truth, but not all of us are aware of it.  Some of us turn our backs on what we erroneously think it is.  Some of us embrace what we erroneously think it is.  Or, some of us are tuned in to it only in varying degrees.  Many are called to a greater degree of awareness, but few choose to follow that call.  The majority of us generally only venture a short distance down a particular path and rest there or call it quits.

We are all travelers on Life's Great Journey.  There are many routes to the same destination and all will get us there eventually.  Frequently, we take little side trips and are more interested in the attractions around the corner.  Sometimes we enjoy the attraction so much that we tarry there and forget where we were going.  The route is not the destination.  You'll only get there if you keep traveling. 

As with any journey, there will be fabulous vistas, new friends, and wonderful treasures along with the potholes, detours, flat tires and missed turns.  That's the fun of a road trip.  To get to your destination just set your compass on God/Goddess, the Divine, Spirit, Mother/Father God, Great Spirit, Jaweh, Jehovah, Allah, Adonai, Abba, Amma, Krishna, The Absolute, Infinite Presence, The Tao, Buddha Mind, The All That Is, The I Am, Universal Mind, Cosmic Consciousness, or whatever you wish to call it in whatever way you experience it.

The Infinite Presence is un-namable and indescribable.  And, it's unknowable if one doesn't seek to know it.  Yet, it is known by those who allow it to be known in them, but only to the degree by which they allow themselves to connect with and know that Presence. 

We cannot judge another's journey or understanding because each of us can perceive only that which we are willing and able to perceive.  The vast majority of us have an extremely limited view of God.  I think that's because God expresses in an infinite variety of ways, and each of us is uniquely designed to perceive and express a different aspect of God. 

We often speak in terms of light and dark, equating light with good and darkness with bad.  In actuality, they are only different aspects of the same thing.  The universe is isomorphic and nothing can exist separately from anything else.  And, since God is both source and substance, it's ALL God.  God is the Destroyer as well as the Giver of Life.  There is a place for each and every aspect of Divinity to be expressed.  And, every aspect of God must be expressed.  It's God's nature to be known.

Still, "enlightened" individuals are deemed to exemplify certain qualities and behaviors that are recognized as "god-like," such as being respectful, joyful, peaceful, and so on.  Frankly, it's more fun to hang out with enlightened people than it is to spend time with hate-mongering, destructive individuals.  For me, anyway.  Someone else would have a different view; invite a member of a known hate group to a peace meditation and you'd most likely experience rejection. 

It's important to note here that even a collection of individuals who align themselves with "higher" ideals can be a hate group.  It's all a matter of degree.  You may be loving in regard to your particular group focus, and your co-participants may be loving toward each other.  But, what is your intention or attitude toward those outside your group who don't share your particular ideals?  Stop and think about how you embody, speak and act on your own beliefs before deciding who is good and who isn't.

What is good and what is bad?  Can there truly be such distinctions?  Certain frequencies or vibrations correspond to certain characteristics.  "Higher," or, "lighter" vibrations correlate with love, light, life, joy, peace, and so on.  "Lower," or, "darker" vibrations equate to anger, jealously, destruction, greed, and similar traits.  And, the higher vibrations tend to be more creative and expansive, while the lower frequencies tend to be more destructive and constricting.  Yet, both are essential for the world to be complete.  The expression of opposites is necessary.  Up can't exist without down.  How do you know you're in heaven if you haven't been in hell?

The interesting thing is that we can consciously choose our vibratory level and shift our experience.  Spend time contemplating peace, love, and harmony, and you will have those feelings.  Or, think about a "bad day" you may have had when nothing seemed to go right.  You were caught in a cycle of frustration and irritation, attracting more of the same.  Some people can move themselves out of a chronically difficult life, while others don't.  And, there are those who choose to remain in the higher frequencies, ultimately transforming their entire lives.  Most of us dip in and out.  That's part of what having a free will is about.

Like attracts like.  So, people who attune themselves to a specific vibration will experience the corresponding expression of that vibration.  And those with similar vibrations naturally gather together.  And then we look over the fence and see what those other folks are up to.  That's when the ideas of "us versus them," or "right versus wrong" start to creep in. 

In actuality, neither is good nor bad.  They are simply different aspects of creation.  Woven together, they create the tapestry that is life.  Each of us holds only one thread.  It may be difficult to see the rest of the tapestry from our own vantage point.  It exists, nonetheless.  Therefore, we must except that our understanding and the understanding of others is limited.  It would be spiritual arrogance to suggest that someone is on the wrong track spiritually simply because he or she perceives the Infinite in a finite way.

Language and ideas are finite and they are inadequate to describe the Infinite.  We call it different things and relate to it in different ways, but whatever we call it or believe it to me does not change its essential Being.  Our ideas about God are our ideas and affect the way in which we perceive and experience the Divine in our lives.  Those individual ideas have nothing to do with what God really is or is not. 

The Divine Presence has no gender or specific form; it simply is what it is.  It will be what it is regardless of our labels or our ideas about the labels used by others.  When you look at a tree you see its trunk, branches and leaves.  You know that it's rooted in the ground and sap runs through it.  Someone who speaks another language will have a different word for the very same tree.  That doesn't mean the tree no longer has roots, branches, bark and leaves.

God won't be offended by what you or I call it or by how anyone else chooses to relate to it.  Perfection by its very nature cannot be offended.  If it could be offended, it wouldn't be perfect, nor would it be impersonal.  Humans are the only ones who can be offended, and that requires a conscious choice to do so. 

Our words or interpretations of the words of others can't change the nature of God, but they do describe to the world our own beliefs.  Limited beliefs reveal themselves through limiting thoughts, words, actions and experiences.

I've stopped taking as gospel the things other people say about God, Jesus, other religions, and spirituality.  I do my own studying and research and I have expanded my study beyond my Christian roots.  These days, I read various translations and interpretations of the Bible, the Quran, the Bhagavad Gita, the Upanishads, the Dhammapada, the Kabala, and the Tao Te Ching.  I also read the writings of ancient and contemporary spiritual writers and mystics from many traditions, philosophers, and scientists.  Rather than take their words and stories as absolute, I strive to glean the overall message from these books. 

I recognize that the writers were and are informed by their own accepted cultural beliefs. Some writers, translators, and religious leaders have very specific agendas and these are woven into their interpretation of the scriptures.  Some ancient translators faced death if they deviated from acceptable interpretations of the day. 

Despite the determination of those of faith who hold fast to their belief in the literal accuracy of their holy texts, many religious historians and theologians now recognize and accept that these texts contain mistranslations from original text, and many scriptures were verbal legends written by people who weren't even present when some of the events were said to have occurred.  In some cases, events were romanticized and expanded on.  Some scholars regard many texts as simply metaphorical and others believe the holy books contain encoded references to deeper mystical teachings that require a more intuitive and personal approach to their interpretation and application. 

Since it's truly impossible to absolutely know what the original writers intended or whether this or that actually happened or was said (after all, who among us was there when any of these things were written?), the key to understanding the scriptures is to look at their life lessons and context, rather than content.  I seek to understand the core messages and then apply those principles in my own life.  Besides, in the long run, the way we interpret divine instruction has nothing whatsoever to do with the nature of the divine, nor does it change that basic nature.  Disagreement and discord about the nature of God doesn't reflect God's will, but rather, seeks to bend other people to our will.  Our imperfect interpretation of a particular word or phrase does not give license to condemn another for his or her beliefs or life choices, or worse, support our own belief that we are "right" and anyone who sees things differently is "wrong." 

I think the key to interpretation of a passage is whether it's an expansive and creative interpretation, or is it judgmental, intolerant, or unsupportive of individual free will?  If the nature of the divine is life, love, abundance, joy, strength, beauty, and peace, then interpretations of the scriptures - and our words and actions - should reflect such. 

Many of our societal and individual wounds come from harsh and limiting interpretation of scripture, resulting in misunderstandings about who/what God is and about our relationship to that and to each other.  Why not simply look for the similarities in all scriptures and agree on core human and spiritual values?  We must, as a culture, move past the focus on who is right or wrong in his or her interpretation of scripture.  We must discontinue our cultural practice of who may have and who may not have. Instead, let's focus on how to bring the fruits of Spirit into the lives of all, that we may all experience the kingdom here and now.

Recently, I heard a news story about a group of people who want to create a community in which all laws and societal functions are based on Biblical principles!  Whose translation and interpretation would be used?  By what yardstick could "progress" or "success" be measured?  Our system of government originally was created to loosely govern and unify a free society using spiritual principles as a foundation.  The drafters of our Constitution were not religionists; in fact, many of them abhorred formal religion.  But, they loved spiritual truth, and that was what they were striving to incorporate into the laws and moral code of the new nation they were creating. 

However, over time the teachings of Jesus have been so badly misconstrued as to have created the misperception that we are somehow weak, undeserving, and incapable of having the experience of the presence of the Divine in our lives. There is a strong emphasis on "good" and "bad" or "right" and "wrong."  If you're not one, you must be the other.  If you are the other, I must fight against you or I might have to examine my own beliefs.  Our culture in particular has been affected by that belief.  

As a result, we strive to deaden ourselves to the pain of our perceived separation through drugs, alcohol, unhealthful habits, activity, noise, "entertainment," and so on.  Since it appears that no-one is looking out for us, we feel we have to look out for "number one."  We discount the needs of others if they aren't in alignment with our own needs.  This is causing even greater schisms, alienation, individual illness, and societal discord. 

Our current political situation is a symptom of that overall discord.  It's not new; religion historically has been manipulated for the political, social, and economic control of multitudes of disparate people.  Throughout the millennia a powerful few have claimed that their actions are somehow sanctified by God, and have unabashedly used extremist interpretations of scripture to support their claims.  This is not limited to Islamist extremists; consider Constantine, the Crusades, the Inquisitions, the Ku Klux Klan, and the regional religious wars that have raged throughout the history of humankind.  Today we are experiencing the usurping of the political process to impose a very unhealthy view of Christianity's teaching.  Ironically, the spiritual principles embodied by our nation's founders have now become a tool to limit freedom and divide the nation. This is where our own nation's morality, creativity, health, peace, well-being, and prosperity have been undermined. 

It's a belief system that is bringing about great pain and destruction.  As a result, I hear many "spiritual" people (that is, those who reject the Western Christian view) rail against the patriarchal religions and culture, condemning anything that remotely smacks of the Westernized Judeo-Christian ethic.  Yet, we are all simply caught in the web of history.  It's no one's fault.  Being angry at the past cannot create peace in the present.  I agree that we must change the destructive, abusive, greedy, fear-based patterns that have brought us to this point.  Yet, it doesn't mean that we must eschew everything related to that seemingly loathsome Abrahamic tradition.  Even the Eastern Mystical teachings have hard-line interpretations that create pain and misery among the populations that practice those religions.  And romanticized views of the spiritual practices of ancient or indigenous cultures don't tell us whether anyone endured strife and hardship as a result of those practices.  Human nature is human nature.  There most likely never has been a human-contrived religion or spiritual practice that didn't leave some destruction or misery in its wake.

There are gems in and among the various teachings that do point the way to a more enlightened treatment of ourselves, the planet and each other.  It requires a new look at all spiritual teachings, including Abrahamic, Eastern, indigenous, ancient and new religions, and more.  The key is to find the common threads and work together to create a more illumined path. 

The solution is not in our turning away from religious dogma (can we blame anyone for choosing to discontinue a relationship with a judgmental, angry, vengeful, paternalistic God?), but in embracing the deeper nature of the divine presence within us and to live lives guided by compassion, mercy, acceptance, tolerance, and peace, governing our words and actions by holding them up to the light of these divine qualities. 

All scriptures tell us that we are one with the Divine.  As such, it can only follow that we are not sinners or in any way insufficient to meet the task of life.  In fact, as God is with us, there is nothing that can be against us -- as long as we live in accordance with Divine principles.  We innately yearn to step into the Good News that was taught by Jesus and many others: We are one with the Divine, we have within us the very capabilities they modeled for us, the kingdom of Heaven is present and we have only to choose to live it. 

The emphasis in the deeper teachings of our religions is similar:  Unity with the Divine is our heritage and privilege and we are all called to live up to the highest potential the Divine created in us.  Clearly, something has been lost in the translations.  That can be changed, however.  And we have the power to change it.

Throughout all of my questioning, the one clear message I perceive is that a pervasive intelligent presence exists (that which I call God), and the ultimate expression of God in our lives is creative, expansive, and non-specific.  We limit our perception and experience of that.  It is who we are and it is not outside of us.  I believe it is the source and substance of everything, that everything that exists is both from God and of God.  I believe that no matter how we perceive or misperceive the presence of God, it's always there; complete, whole, perfect, and ready and willing to be a guiding presence in our lives.  We have only to recognize and accept it.

I've had to struggle to accept that I don't really know anything, despite everything that I've been taught.  But, in the willingness to not know anything, I am free to learn something.  My old ideas are constantly challenged as I allow new thoughts and concepts to percolate.  It's not easy to release those cherished religious traditions that are so deeply ingrained.  Those traditions defined my own identity, as well as my relationships with family, friends, coworkers, and community.  And it's sometimes difficult to think, speak, and act differently from those around me, or to sit in quiet tolerance of someone else's harsh and critical words.  Or to turn around and walk away from something that isn't supportive of life and individual free will, regardless of what others will think of me.  Or to live by a particular ideal even if it isn't popular or the acceptable "group-think" of the day while still respecting the beliefs of others.

Thich Nhat Hanh writes, "True love contains respect."  I choose the path of love.  Therefore, I must practice respect.  Acceptance of another's views, tolerance, and compassion are conscious choices that we have the power - and responsibility -- to make.  Acceptance and understanding don't require our agreement, but they do require our openness, receptivity, and compassion.  That active compassion opens doors to a greater awareness of the all-ness that God is because it allows us to see and experience the myriad expressions - both light and dark - created by the Creator.  Openness allows us to connect with each other, and in doing so, to connect with the fullness that is God.

We are not required to change each other; we are only required to change ourselves through deeper communion with the Divine.  I have a refrigerator magnet that reminds me daily of this concept:  "The vision that you glorify in your mind, the ideal that you enthrone in your heart - this you will build your life by, this you will become."  The artist attributes this quote to James Allen.

We can increase the awareness of God's Truth and enthrone its ideal in our hearts through spiritual study and practice.  That awareness transforms us.  We are not personally and deeply transformed through simple belief and faith in something someone else tells us is God's nature or will, although we can act it out and mimic it.  For honest, deeply personal communion with God and understanding of what God is creating uniquely in, though and as our own being, we must empty ourselves of any idea, teaching, belief or supposed understanding of what God is or is not.  A full vessel can only contain that which its boundaries allow it to contain.  We must be vessels with unlimited boundaries, allowing ourselves to perceive the fullness of the experience of the presence of God. 

I don't call myself a believer or person of faith.  To do so would be to imply that I could choose to believe that there is a power or presence that is greater than or equal to God, or to consider that there is a possibility that God does not exist.  Since I have had the direct experience of knowing God, I cannot relate to it from simple faith or belief.  Therefore, my journey and my practice are to know God.  In knowing God, I can only accept that its presence is real and never failing.  It is immanent and transcendent.  All I have to do is to take the time to perceive its presence and know that presence to be the breather of my breath while also knowing it as the source and substance of my breath.  To breathe the breath of God is to be fully alive and it gives us what we need to "ease on down the road."

Do I have the authority to write about God?  Who's really to say?  Most writings about God and spirituality have come from explorations similar to mine.  Who among us really is an expert?  I don't claim to be one.  But, what the heck.  Maybe these words will prompt you to consider your relationship with God.  Perhaps you'll embark on your own journey, to know your own understanding of Truth.  This is an invitation to discover the God in your heart and to live from it.

Where do the words on these pages come from?  I pray, meditate, and write.  Sometimes the writing is from my mind or my emotions, other times it's from someplace else.  I believe that "someplace else" is from the All That Is, the Infinite, the Divine, from God.  I am simply a seeker.  My understanding has evolved over time and I know it isn't perfect.  I also know it will continue to evolve as I delve more deeply into conscious awareness of the presence of the Divine.  I make no claims about these words.  I write them because they have a certain truth for me.  I share them for no other reason than to provide grist for the mill of your own contemplation.  This is, after all, only a book.

I'm simply a traveler on the journey home.  I endeavor to allow God's love to lead the way.  It makes the journey less stressful and more incredibly rewarding than I could make it on my own.

In the end, as it is every day, it will only be God and me.  There will be no religion or spiritual path; no ministers, preachers, teachers or gurus; no Great Mystery.  It will be my soul to God's soul; the God in me facing that which created it.

And God will ask, "Well, kiddo.  What did you learn?"  I will close my eyes, click together the heels of my ruby slippers and reply, "I learned that there's no place like home, and it was right here all along."

Karen E. Kelsay © 2006  All rights reserved.