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easter
February 2009 
Conversation with Peter and Matthew -- or, how we got Peeps
Karen
Easter is just around the corner. I can tell because I see rows of pastel-hued Peeps in the grocery store, right next to the Cadbury eggs. (Did you hear the one about the biologist who just realized he's spent all this time studying a Cadbury egg?).
Since shifting away from Westernized/capitalized religion, I don't do much during the Christianized pagan holidays we now call Christmas and Easter. There are lots of reasons for that. Frankly, I just don't like the commercialization, drama and contrived expectations that accompany these overwrought holidays. Super Bowl Sunday has taken on the same festive atmosphere, especially since folks utter their Hail Maries for touchdown drives as well as souls.
It's not that I dislike holidays or religion and I love Peeps (they're best when removed from their wrapping and ageing for about three days before biting into them). But I'd rather remember my teachers and honor their teachings in my own, quiet way.
I see and hear a lot of consternation around organized religion, and I'm thinking perhaps it's not the religion that bothers us, but it's abuses. Those abuses aren't inherent in the religion, but in its followers. Which, I suppose, is really why we need religion. Without it, we might not have any knowledge of the teachings of the sages and mystics who light our way.
As I contemplate Easter, I can't help but think about what might have followed the crucifixion if the early followers of Yeshua decided to chuck it and go on with their day to day.
An imagined conversation between Peter and Matthew:
"Well. That was interesting."
"Yeah. He really pissed off the wrong people this time."
"Still, I think he handled it remarkably well. Especially that last bit."
"Yup. It was pretty inspirational. Almost as good as that loaves and fishes thing. Great fish, too, I might add."
"Aw, that's nuthin'. You should see what David Copperfield can do with helicopters and aircraft carriers. But the fish was exceptionally good that day. The wine was tasty, too. It was a good year for the River Jordan."
"Yeah, that was pretty awesome. The fish, I mean. Might've been fun to see him saw a woman in half. Ya gotta figure that he'd have a great finish to that one, what with raising people from the dead and all."
"Nah, Mary Magdalene is ticklish."
"Yeah. Probably not a good idea."
"Nah."
"So, what're we gonna do now? Maybe we should do or say something. You know, so folks will remember. The Divine Miss M said she went to the tomb and his body was gone!"
"Mary always was exciteable. You never really know what's going on with her. She probably went to the wrong tomb. You know women can't read maps!"
"Well, Thomas said he actually saw Yeshua and even poked his fingers into the wounds in Master's hands!"
"Thomas is a lush. You saw how much wine he drank the last time we all had a meal together. Next thing ya know, he's going to be telling us he danced with pink elephants."
"Well, do you think maybe Thomas might have really seen something? I mean, isn't it a possibility?"
"I doubt it."
"Yeah, you're probably right."
"Yeah."
"But still, don't you think we should spread the word or something? I mean, otherwise, all of this suffering and stuff will be wasted."
"Ya know, I'm not really up for torture and hanging around on crosses on rainy days. Besides, my wife would be really pissed if I was gone for long periods. She already says I never take her anywhere. Can you imagine what I'd have to put up with if I went on a road trip without her?"
"Yeah, you're probably right. Well, so...what are you going to do now?"
"I dunno. Maybe have lunch."
"Yeah."
"Yeah."
"So - you want some hummus with that?"
All kidding aside - without religion, we might not have any way of receiving the best of the information that was brought in by the Masters.
We get hung up when we take sides and square off over subtleties of meaning. We take it far too personally. We need to remember that the message is our salvation. Not the messenger.
But it is a nice excuse to have Peeps once in a while.
All rights reserved. Copyright 2008 by Karen E. Kelsay.
Access: Public
…I like the part about Mary M being ticklish !…how did you know ?…
…Easter is a big deal at our house…our yard is the only one big enough for the extended family…last year we had 50 people here…lots of little girls !…the goddess energy is strong here !…most of the family is not too into religion…but the spiritual aspects of the season are celebrated…
When the kids were smaller, I taught them about Lent, and we made Lenten sacrifices. That was actually the best part about Easter for them - because, even though it is linked with Christianity now - it is part of a larger spiritual tradition of self-reflection, introspection and fasting (literally and figuratively). My eldest daughter is the only one observing it this year, and she gave up sugar ( a favorite comfort food - she's not a big consumer of sweets, but it's the one food she will eat more out of emotional / hormonal motivation than anything else). I admire her reasons for observing Lent. It's not about doing what the church prescribes, but about taking a step back and examining how she might be using sugar as a way of distancing herself from painful or unpleasant emotions.
It's funny, the celebration of Easter / Christmas, etc. are as much a celebration (if not more) of commercialism, as they are of Jesus. I loved your mock dialog. Jesus certainly didn't want to be worshiped. He was a purveyor of wisdom, as you said. I wonder, would he go into Walmart and cause a ruckus and tear down the Easter display? Or, would he grab a cart, go buy some new sandals, a Grateful Dead CD and a bag of peeps, just for the heck of it. My Jesus ain't a preacher, he's a teacher - a regular guy with weaknesses and flaws - that's why he loved all mankind so much - he could relate. Great post. Good fun.
Will – she probably also had morning breath. All that fish and wine – ugh.
Otter – I'd like to think he'd appreciate the Grateful Dead. Do you think maybe he'd be an Elvis fan, too?
Thank you both for sharing your Easter stories. I have mine, too. Like the way the Easter Cow always left a Peeps on the bedside table on the night before Easter. When I awoke on Easter morning, the first thing I could smell was that wonderful, sugary scent! My Peeps was devoured before my feet ever hit the floor.
I started a new tradition with my kids – the Easter Cow. We're the only family I know of that knows the true identity of the candy-dispensing animal. Where else would you get milk chocolate? It took some convincing, though. My son, at the tender age of four, looked at me with a frown, put his hands on his hips and said, “Mom! A cow would wreck the whole house!” Today he's a project engineer for a major aerospace company.
Yeah, he'd probably like Elvis. An Easter Cow, eh? Once, one of my Mom's friends crocheted us kids “poop ducks” for an Easter present. They were filled with jelly beans, and when you squeezed them, well, you can guess the result. I think my Mom still has one of them stuffed in a tea-cup somewhere in her china cabinet. I should see if I can find a pattern for it. My niece (7) and my nephew (9) would probably get a kick out of it. So, would my son.
ohm my word, reminds me of philip at age 4 asking me if i really expected him to believe that a giant rabbit was breaking into our house to give him candy!
karen, your writing is wonderful! - thank you for sharing :)